We were enjoying a BBQ in the back yard of his house outside Johannesburg, when my late friend and army buddy said something that has always stayed with me.

Kobus had been telling me how he got rich. And his statement at the very end of his story is one I will never forget.

After we left the army at the end of our conscription, he didn’t know what to do with himself, so he became a psychiatric nurse. I remembered it well – we use to have drunken parties at his apartment on the very grounds of the mental institution, and anyone who observed our intoxicated, wild antics have assumed we were patients.

Then he married a female nurse who turned out to be gay. Then he became a medical sales representative and did very well.

Getting Rich is Akin to Getting Physically Fit

While Kobus was a sales rep, he started a plastics company in his garage, making desktop penholders to sell to the doctors along with the drugs, then he manufactures basins and bathtubs, and then bought a women’s clothing store, and so on. We remained good friends and played squash and sailed together, and here we were reminiscing.

I asked him, “Koebs, when did you become a millionaire? It must have been a very exciting day for you!”

And here was his answer: “Rob, I didn’t even realize it when I became a millionaire – it sort of creeps up on you – money starts flowing naturally when you’re in the right head space.”

I later experienced the same thing, but the way he described the process of getting rich is akin to getting physically fit. Like the day when you suddenly realize you have just pedaled three kilometers without even realizing it, because you were so busy thinking about other things.

In the beginning, every turn of the pedal is a concerted effort, tiring, and even exhausting. But if you persevere, one day you realize that you’re finally fit.

Are You A Quitter?

Ninety-seven percent of people quit so easily that it would be laughable if it wasn’t so sad. There is such a dearth of self-respect, self-discipline, and self-esteem out there that it is frightening.

People seem to have got to a point where they have even less shame than manners. I would be mortified if I had to cancel a meeting at the last minute or show up late for an appointment, but most people hardly blink.

Winners are tough on themselves, and they will endure pain, blisters, rejection, and difficulty without complaining or making excuses, UNTIL they succeed.

Not As Scary as it Seems

One night, Kobus and I were camping in the bush after leaving the army. I had my dad’s .38 special snub-nosed revolver, and he was armed with a hunting knife. In the middle of the night, we heard someone approaching our tent.

I cocked the revolver, Kobus unsheathed his knife, and we sprang out of the tent to confront our attacker, who turned out to be a large frog that was hopping around and bumping our cooking utensils.

Often, the threats we perceive in business are not close to as scary and dangerous as we think they might be. There are scarier things out there.

The Measure of A Great Man

Kobus died a few years back, but I have wonderful memories of him as a man of character and substance – a real man, whether we were fighting for our lives in Angola in the army, doing business, or having fun. He was a man of his word who had my back, and men like him are few and far between.

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One Response to “Headcase, Headspace, and Frogs: A Profound Statement from My Late Friend”

  1. karl schneider Says:

    Thank you much for this blog. The men we find like this in our life area treasure. Thank you again for sharing this story with us; it is truly needed for us to hear stories of this stature.
    karl

Leave a Reply

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